The Unbelievable Top Secret Diary of Pig (Unabridged ed)

We love Pig (we can't help it), but Pig loves Farmer, and he can't help it either. After all, Farmer gives Pig yummy slops and special back scratches, and calls him Sausage and seems to love him more, the fatter he gets. Just as well Pig doesn't speak any Farmer. But Duck does (Duck's clever like that), and he's determined his best friend should know the truth. This is tough for Pig. But Pig won't just sit there and weep (though we may do, on his behalf), because there's help from an unexpected quarter: the Evil Chickens have a plan ...